Sigh....

I haven't posted in a while. Our family had a terrible event this past weekend. Long story short, my husband's father passed away. We were having a big surprise party on Saturday for his 99th birthday, which was Monday. Friday afternoon, he had a massive stroke and never woke up. He died Sunday morning at 6:30. I know you are all thinking, "well, 99 years old... you had to expect it!" We did always have it in the back of our minds, but Pop was the most vibrant, funny, friendly person I've ever met. He didn't look or act his age at all. Most people guessed his age between 70 or 75, and sometimes younger! Plus we were so wrapped up in the party preparations, and he was perfectly fine that morning, that it caught us off guard. He was fixing something in the shower when it happened. He was always working on something, usually making it worse than it was before, lol. But that's just because of his age. He was a great carpenter in his day, and taught my hubby everything he knows. It was funny though, because in his later years, Pop would tell my hubby he was doing something wrong... and hubby would say, "You are the one who showed me how to do it this way!" I have lots of good memories. Everyone loved him. The terrible thing about all this is watching my poor husband go through it. He's never experienced death, and his dad was his best friend. My husband was born when Pop was 50 years old, and he was able to be home with him a lot. My hubby was his parents' only child together, the kids from previous marriages were grown and gone. I am happy for Pop, he never knew what hit him, he didn't suffer, and didn't linger. We had a lot of family and friends in town for the party, so there was a great support system this weekend, but now things are calming down and reality is setting in for my husband. It shatters me to see him cry, he is a gentle giant who doesn't let that part of him show. I feel so helpless and sad, but I know he has to be let to do it... I've been through death before (not at his level of pain, but almost), and I know what he's going through. If I didn't know, I would be blind with panic, because he's a person right now, who I've never seen before. I hope he comes back to me, I miss him. And I wish to God I could take his pain for him. But I can't. :-(